Why are extroverts so insecure

Are you ambiverted? These 12 pieces of evidence speak for it

Do you see yourself as neither introverted nor extroverted? But somewhere in between? You are probably ambiverted! The made-up word "ambiverted" describes an intermediate state that lies between introverted and extroverted. Somehow a bit of both, but not a clear expression. How this personality trait manifests itself, why it is a success criterion and how you can find out whether you are also ambiverted ...

➠ Content: This is what awaits you

➠ Content: This is what awaits you

What does it mean to be ambiverted?

When it comes to personality, we often tend to pigeonhole thinking:

  • Either a person is open, sociable, impulsive, loud, aware of the mission, expressive - extroverted.
  • Or one of them is reserved, calm, closed, shy of contact, shy, withdrawn - just introverted.

Either or - but it's not that simple, even if psychological tests like to paint it that way. The psychologist Adam Grant from Wharton University stated: A full two thirds of people cannot clearly identify either of the two camps. They both have inherent qualities and act and behave depending on the situation - sometimes introverted, sometimes extroverted. Or just ambiverted. Depending on your mood and situation, your behavior tends to fluctuate in one of the two directions. But that's not enough to be considered introverted or extroverted.

In psychology, however, the term is far less popular. Although C. G. Jung, who coined the terms introversion and extraversion, also established at the time that there is a third and very broad gray area - that of the Ambiversion. Or as he put it himself: “There is no one who is completely introverted or extroverted. Such a person would be in a madhouse. ”Classically, however, personalities are still determined using the so-called“ Big Five ”characteristics, which include extraversion or intraversion:

To be ambiverted: This is how it expresses itself

The fact that the term ambivalence is relatively unknown, although it ultimately characterizes the majority of people, can be explained: extremes are simply more conspicuous and have a high recognition value. Mixed forms, on the other hand, are neither fish nor meat. However, ambivalence has some advantages that are hidden behind the less shimmering attitude. Ambiverted characters combine some strengths of both extremes, which reveal themselves depending on the situation and mood:

adaptability

Ambiverted people are not tied to a particular path, but rather adaptable. For example, you can take advantage of the sociability of an extrovert and, on another occasion, show the prudence and courtesy of an introvert. In short: You can adjust to your counterpart better and often demonstrate empathy and social competence. And of course they help with your career in professional life as well as in your private life.

stability

Ambiverted people are balanced and bring (emotional) stability with them. While introverts react sensitively to external influences and extroverts are sometimes insensitive to ignorant, ambiverted people find themselves in a balance between these two poles. Criticism and rejection do not throw them off course; Applause and success don't go to their heads that quickly either. That makes them appear much more professional and serious overall.

Ambiversion is a success factor

Being ambiverted doesn't mean being indecisive. Ambiverted people combine the best of both worlds and draw strength from them. This gives them important soft skills. Mental and emotional flexibility that sometimes shows sociability and sometimes enjoys solitude; which sometimes remains cautious and sometimes hits the plaster and shows what it's made of.

It is no coincidence that ambiverted people are often more successful than merely extroverts and more creative than introverts. You can gain something from every location, you feel good and you radiate that. On top of that, that makes her extremely personable. Because where an introvert appears like a gray mouse and an extrovert like a whisker in the interview, the ambivert shows the right amount of openness and restraint.

Test: 12 signs that you are ambiverted

How would you rate yourself? As ambivalent or introverted or extroverted? There are a few typical signs and behaviors that suggest an ambivalent personality. Naturally, these are less obvious than with the extreme manifestations, but they are nonetheless present. If you recognize the following ten patterns in yourself, there are some indications that you have an ambiverted personality:

  1. You feel comfortable in different situations
    You don't mind a networking evening with many new faces any more than a cozy evening alone with a good book. You feel equally comfortable in different environments.
  2. You think about everything a lot
    Important decisions are not easy for ambitious people. Here, too, there are characteristics of introversion and extraversion: At first they brood and analyze alone. But where introverts make a decision afterwards, ambiverted still ask friends or colleagues for advice.
  3. You are good at judging others
    Ambiverted people have a keen sense of social interaction. They recognize the motives behind a statement and can adjust to their counterpart (or a society). Ultimately, there is another positive quality behind these fine antennas: the ability to self-reflect.
  4. You are told that you are personable.
    In particular, if you get the feedback that you are a personable person more often, that speaks in favor of Ambiversion. Ultimately, it is about the external confirmation of the point before: Precisely because you can adjust and adapt so well to your environment, you perceive the other as a pleasant listener or conversation partner - depending on the situation.
  5. You are in control of your emotions
    Emotions such as anger and anger mostly remain in balance in ambiverted people. They keep your mood swings in check and only slam the table when you have to. As a means to an end, not as a valve. But then everything is fine again.
  6. You need time to build trust
    There is a healthy dose of distrust in you. Or to put it in positive terms: ambitious people take their time to make real friendships and get to know people thoroughly. For example, you may always be suspicious of composed and closed people, while you quickly find others to be artificial and artificial - always when they themselves tend to be more extreme.
  7. You can let others go first
    Another trait that extroverts find difficult. But because you have the flexibility you need, you don't have to climb every stage just because the limelight is opening up. The other way around, you can become a rampage pig or assert yourself where necessary. But you don't need that for your general well-being.
  8. Depending on the place, you can be a completely different person
    There are days or places - you are like a different person. Some friends may hardly recognize you. An understanding listener and helpful colleague at work, but on Friday evening you mutate into a party animal or a star in the sports club. You have both in you - and both take time and space.
  9. You can refuel your energy reserves in different ways
    Both by a quiet evening in front of the telly or with a book in the bathtub, as well as by a lively evening with friends or new acquaintances. Or in short: You like to be alone, but sometimes you need people around you.
  10. You don't fit into any of the extremes
    Perhaps the best indication that you are ambiverted: you do not feel you belong to either camp. Being alone for a long time is troubling for you, but if there is too much going on around you, you also want more rest. Since your character is in the gray area in between, you need the balance between the two poles. Only when you have reached this balance do you feel really good.
  11. You are stable in performance
    They essentially deliver consistent performance. Even when things get a bit hectic, ambiverted people don't get off their feet, because they can concentrate just as well as introverts.
  12. You are a team player and lone fighter
    You don't necessarily need colleagues around you all the time. Even as a lone fighter, you do your job well. Neither are you a misanthropist - you are just as happy to work on tasks in a team.

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January 13, 2021Author: Jochen Mai

Jochen Mai is the founder and editor-in-chief of the career bible. The author of several books lectures at the TH Köln and is a sought-after keynote speaker, coach and consultant.

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