How many women are married to crossdressers

Crossdressing is the name for all people who wear clothes of the opposite sex, but often - but not always - remain aware of their gender identity. “You can't compare crossdressers with trans people, homosexuals or drag queens. There can of course be a mixture, but a crossdresser consciously wears women's clothes as a man or men's clothes consciously as a woman ”, says Mag. Michael Peintner, educational scientist, sex educator, sex counselor and coach at Courage Innsbruck. He had a few affected clients as clients, but he couldn't say how many people tend to do it: "With such a strongly taboo topic, there are no numbers and the number of unreported cases is very high." Peintner explains further that crossdressing is basically an erotic variety . There are men who find it appealing to slip into lingerie or women's clothes - the reverse pattern is less known and probably also widespread among women.

One could not speak of a mental disorder here. This is only possible when there is a clinically relevant level of suffering, it becomes torture for several months and the social and professional environment is also severely impaired. A problem can also arise if, for example, a partner discovers her husband's mostly secret passion. “As a first step, it is important to educate women. She has to understand that very often it has nothing to do with her as a person or with the common sexuality and that she is therefore just as important for her partner, ”says Peintner. For many women it is unthinkable to integrate this fetish into their common sexuality - nevertheless it is necessary to give the topic its place in the partnership. Even if it often takes time for men to be able to talk about it. Women should not reproach themselves for having done anything wrong: "What we love in sexuality, what we (don't) like and how we want to shape sexuality, is formed in the so-called sexual scripts or forms from an early age. the Lovemaps (love maps). That is the current opinion of sex researchers. "

Couples therapy is almost inevitable in such cases, Peintner knows. Because it is difficult to cope with this surprise. Women are also very welcome to visit one of the numerous Austrian advice centers on this topic on their own in order to receive individual professional support on how to deal with this new situation.